The Great Teddy Bear Massacre
If toy bears could talk, Elvis Presley’s beloved teddy, a 1909 Steiff named Mabel, would have a gut-ripping tale to tell. And if they could sing, her theme song might be “You ain’t nothin’ but a hound dog … and you ain’t no friend of mine.”
In case you hadn’t heard, Mabel had a little accident recently. She and hundreds of other rare teddies had been loaned to Wookey Hole Caves in Somerset, England, for an exhibition. We’re not just talking any old bears, but highly collectible antique bears worth more than $900,000. Rare bears. Important bears. Bears with provenance. Mabel alone, with her Elvis provenance, was valued at more than $75,000. So insurers insisted that a guard dog watch over her and the rest of the gang at night while the exhibition was being prepared.
What happened will likely go down as the most brutal teddy bear bloodbath in history. While the guard dog in question, a sleek Doberman named Barney, had six years of loyal service, he apparently flew into a violent rage for no apparent reason. It took ten short minutes, but before his handler Greg West could get him under control, fuzzy arms, legs, ears lay all over the ground. Eyes were gouged out. There were pools of fluff and sawdust everywhere. The carnage included some 100 bears.
Poor Mabel was left with a gaping chest hole in her chest, and her head torn nearly off. Heartbreak hotel.
Trying to make sense of the situation, Greg West said: “I still can’t believe what happened. Either there was a rogue scent of some kind on Mabel which switched on Barney’s deepest instincts, or it could have been jealousy: I was just stroking Mabel and saying what a nice little bear she was.”
Whatever it was, it was not an easy situation to explain to the bears’ owners, who were understandably distressed. Perhaps most upset of all was Mabel’s owner, Sir Benjamin Slade, a British aristocrat with a passion for Elvis memorabilia. He sent someone else to collect Mabel’s remains and is reportedly still not speaking to anyone about the incident.
As for Barney, he’s been retired to a farm, where he can chase chickens. Not a bad deal for an old hound dog. And note to the insurance company: Next time, consider a human guard or maybe a locked vault. —M.T.
October 30th, 2006 19:22
Marina, enjoyed your article. I had heard about this several weeks ago. Having lived with the likes of Tucker, I could have told them it was idiotic to choose a guard dog! We will miss you at Thanksgiving but look forward to Dec. 17.